Tuesday, March 08, 2005

Anatomy Of A Change Of Heart

1/ I turned around only to see you in his arms. Perhaps the stuffy environment warranted a mouth-to-mouth resuscitation.

2/ He gave you a farewell hug and kiss as we bid farewell in Suriwong. Guess the session you had with him earlier at the sauna was too intense, and the thought of not being able to feel each other again for a long time, too distressing to bear.

3/ You left me alone at the departure lounge to get to a public phone for a farewell phone call to him. Guess an SMS just won’t do.

4/ I could almost feel your aching heart as we prepared for take off. You said it’s the same emotions you felt many years ago, when you bid farewell to me in Pudu Raya to catch a bus back to Singapore for work. Did we hug and kiss too? I could not recall.

5/ You went downstairs after dinner to get a calling card. You did your calculations and concluded that the rates are 80% cheaper. Put on the headphones as you play and replay the telephone conversations you recorded on the mobile.

6/ Did you say you’re going back to Bangkok again to see him, only him? Thanks for calculating my annual leave balance for me, and concluding that since I only had two days left in my pot, I would not be able to join you. You said you will buy me some t-shirts from Chatuchak, you have to work harder on those half-hearted offers.

Did you asked if I would be sad/angry if you really go? Does my answer really matter?

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