Monday, June 19, 2006

Counting Cocks

Have you ever paid ridiculous sums of money just to be associated with numbers commonly regarded as auspicious for the Chinese? Of course, I would understand that you won’t feel secured driving around in a car with a license plat that reads ‘9413’ (literally: nine times die, one time survive), or feel blessed living in a house numbered ‘1458’ (literally: whole lifetime no prosper).

That still doesn’t mean we have to jostle with the rest of the entire straight world of oily-faced businessmen and diamond-ring adorning tai tai’s for that dream number.

No, we don’t. We simply need to redefine the word auspicious.

So here, is the list of BravingKL-approved gay-auspicious numbers for your consideration when the next car, house, hotel room or sauna visit (for the locker number) come around:

7373 (pronounced: chart sung chart sung, literally: cock thrive cock thrive)
You cannot go wrong with a thriving, throbbing cock that stands in undivided attention to the call of its master, ever ready and hungry for action.

7878 (pronounced: chart fart chart fart, literally: cock prosper cock prosper)
A prosperous cock is one that is in-demand, well-maintained and well-served. What more could you ask for?

9797 (pronounced: gau chart gau chart, literally: play cock play cock)
Yes, you’re gay and that’s what you should enjoy doing. No guarantee on the condition of the cocks, or of their respective owners though.

1197 (pronounced: yard yard gau chart, literally: day day play cock)
A cock a day keeps the PMS away.

1497 (pronounced: yard sai gau chart, literally: whole lifetime play cock)
A lifetime supply of cocks for your constant enjoyment. Now let’s hope it’s not just referring to playing your own cock.

4497 (pronounced: sai sai gau chart, literally: every lifetime play cock)
For firm believers in the concept of reincarnation, you would want to opt for this far more ambitious alternative. Technically, however, the statement still hold true even if you reborn as a straight girl.

1978 (pronounced: yard gau chart fart, literally: once play cock prosper)
It’s time to break the closet door! Come get your first taste of cock and you are on your way to earning big bucks.


Evil, evil numbers to avoid at ALL COST:

9714 (pronounced: gau chart sart sei, literally: play cock definitely die)
Go ahead and book this if you’re gay curious but decide to stay a virgin for the rest of your life.

1157 (pronounced: yard yard mm chart, literally: everyday no cock)
The curse many of us would rather die than to bear with. It’s various iterations like 57 and 75 are also a no-no.

1457 (pronounced: yard sei mm chart, literally: whole lifetime no cock)
The gay man’s ultimate curse, to be avoided at all cost.


And now, can you think of anymore to add to this list?


12 comments:

defiant85 said...

Wakakakak. Never came across my mind. Cocks away~~~ :P

Anonymous said...

I just wonder if this is applicable for the other gay's reproduction area? XD

wyler said...

Yes to:
6767 - cock, cock.
4967 - keep playing cock
6748 - keep getting rich
6754 - cock never die
6788 - sure rich one

No-no to:
5967 - never play cock
6758 - never get rich
1667 - all the way 'cock' (unlucky)
(opposite of 1668)
1167 - everyday been cursed
1367 - whole life been cursed

Anonymous said...

Wow!

BravingKL's Guide to Numerology???

livinlife

greateastern26 said...

pick one you like and then can go buy lottery.

canardbidon said...

fantabulous!

just like what i always said... the middle finger shld be adopted as the universal gay man's good luck gesture - wht could be better than wishing someone cock?!

greateastern26 said...

carnardbidon, try that in a sauna and see if you get what you want

bravingkl said...

defiant85:
now perhaps you'll be more alert to the number 7 appearing in numbers around you. :P

anonymous:
I've spent my whole life knowing of only one male reproduction 'area' for the male, gay or otherwise. So perhaps you'll need to elaborate? :P

wyler:
great thinking! I'll have to update my list now!

livinlife:
aptly said. :P

greateastern:
make sure you belanja me when you strike!

canarbidon:
you wish a bottom plenty of cocks using the middle finger, are you forgetting the other half of the population (more or less, i dunno)now?

Anonymous said...

My h/p number ends with 9768..Damn! Got a good reason to play cock some more..

can

ça va pas la tête said...

hahhaaaaaaaaaaaaaa oh my good lord.

pakcik said...

ahh..no longer can see number 7 in the same way :)

honestly i rather choose 1978. dont know why.

sgboy said...

what an interesting post! Had a good laugh (and this is coming from a guy who is crap at canto)

great blog I will def be back...