Friday, October 07, 2005

The Seven Sins of Mirage

The Priceless Vase

Sitting on the top of the human food chain, the Priceless Vase represents the epitome of culinary delight with their model quality looks and prime cut meat. To the mere mortals, they are the unreachable, the untouchables, a dream too beautiful to materialise, yet they represent a challenge worth shaving off 3 years of your lifespan. Unlike its porcelain equivalent though, the Priceless Vase normally depreciates with time. As the clock ticks away and the crowd dwindle, give him your best shot and you may just have your prayers answered.

The Super Cum Container
The Super Cum Container presents the perfect solution for a quick and effortless catch. Commonly associated with expired uncles with greasy faces, beer bellies, retreating penises, and smelly breath, they are constantly found roaming in the darkest corner of the upper and lower dark rooms in search of willing preys either too hungry to be selective with their meat or have pride too brittle to be broken by rejections. Tirelessly and meticulously, they work their charms and magic spells on your tool to suck your week-old cum and worries away. Completely free of charge, no reciprocal actions expected.

The Marathon Fucker
The Marathon Fuckers come in a wide variety of flavours, and normally have looks and appearances that are above par and quality expectations that are below par, to warrant a constant stream of meat for a demanding appetite. Extending his stay beyond the duration of the normal crowd, he ensures money well spent by a tireless repertoire of courting and intercourse. This illusive personality spends only 5% of his time locating his prey and the remaining time devouring them in one of the private rooms.

The Single Bullet Gunman
To the Single Bullet Gunman, Mirage presents a single, unfazed proposition for a quick fix, not unlike that of a fast food chain. Single-minded, clear and focused on his one and only agenda, he comes, he kills and he goes, leaving no trace of his identity, no means for follow-up contact beyond the walls of Mirage, and certainly no emotions behind. As the door slams shut, he leaves the fantasy world behind and returns home to his family, friends and colleagues, physically contented and ready to brave the cruel, straight world that he has grew up in and is reluctant to leave.

The Hyperactive Kid
Super-charged with raging hormones, the Hyperactive Kid can be seen braving the entire fleet of stairs of the 5-storey building in one breath of air. With an ego as high as his hormones, and most probably skin as thin as my oil-control sheet, he would rather die than to be seen engaged in any form of courting actions with the others. His facial expressions do not cater for the slightest leakage of emotions that would betray him into showing the faintest of interest to the hunky uncle at the corner of his eyes. Constantly in denial of his urges, his testosterone finds no outlet and is thus channelled from the copulating muscles to the exercising muscles. Stand aside uncles, or have your frail bones shattered by the human bullet.

The Saint
The Saint is an anti-thesis of the sauna culture, a living irony to remind us that there are guys out there who are willing to pay RM20 to do anything other than the one single thing on everyone else’s agenda. Piles of perfectly sculpted bodies in copulation heat yet the Saint remains unperturbed as he busied himself in front of the PC surfing the web, or pumping irons in the ill-equipped gym, or reading magazines in the courtyard garden. Oblivious to the attention paid to him, he is permenantly detached from the world of seductive play by avoiding all eye contacts, and brushing off all attempts to establish other physical channels.

The Sociable Sister
If not for the Sociable Sister, the Mirage dream would be an experience void of colours and sound. Dressed in towels wrapped in a fashionable twist, the Sisters sashay along the walkways as they pay visit to different corners of the saunas, freely dispensing the latest beauty tips, the most up-to-date gossips about gay politicians, artists, TV commentators, and sport personalities and last but certainly not least, the most intimate sex stories for all to savour and enjoy. It is not uncommon for peals of laughter to penetrate into the darkest corner of the dark room. To the Sociable Sister, Mirage is a place to chill out and chat the weekend evening away without having to put up with strange glances from the curious public.

So which sins have you committed lately?

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